My gentle postpartum reset
My gentle postpartum reset:
over the first 6 weeks, as someone whose experienced ppd
PHASE 1: REGULATE before rebuilding
what regulating looked like:
letting myself be okay being still
Maybe you’re someone who has a lot goals, hates being home, or lives in a city where hustle and bustle is embedded into your nervous system… I’ve known all 3 of these to be true for me at one point in my life which made my first time pp really difficult. I didn’t see the beauty in slowing down with my newborn, but now I understand the work I was doing was unmatched, invaluable, and surely taken for granted in society. Carrying a child, giving birth, and supporting life required me to staying gentle with myself through the transition, a skill I’d carry on with me forever
finding a few good comfort shows to binge
If I’m going to be home on the couch I’ll do so gladly as long as I have a really good show to keep me company. Maybe something I’ve watched before to keep it predictable or low stress balanced with something new and exciting keeping my mind off the velcro baby latched onto me.
getting outside daily
Sunlight on the skin, perhaps no greater gift for the brain! But no one prepares you to have a baby two days before the time change, where the sun disappears before 5pm everyday. So even if it was just 10 mins on the porch, fresh air everyday was a game changer.
taking that 1st ‘Everything Shower’
There’s a quick shower and then there’s the Everything Shower. I’m talking full shampoo, hair mask, shave, moisturize, blowdry & style, the 1st one after giving birth not only revives you but reminds you what a bad ass bitch you are
plenty of hydration and protein
Almost a non negotiable for a breastfeeding mom. I was absolutely starving all day long the first few days after birth mainly my body sucking all the nutrients out of me to make milk. I knew I had to be eating but also was excited to eat less now that I wasn’t building a baby! Protein was the answer for me 😋
continuing prenatal vitamins and avoiding alcohol
I stocked up on prenatals hoping it’d help with the healing process, milk production, and any hair loss 😖
As much as I love champagne I knew my hormones were going to be all out of wack so I decided to avoid anything that would make it worse. I knew if I went 9 months without it I could do it for another 2 -3 weeks
PHASE 2: RECLAIM pieces of myself
what reclaiming looked like:
solidifying a 3-step daily makeup routine
Some days I’d have time for more but the basic non negotiables for me came down to mascara (we ride for each other ❤️), a lippie combo, and some under eye cc. Something super simple that made me feel a little more fabulous while changing diapers all day
gifting myself a push present
Something I planned all pregnancy was to treat myself to at least one self care item. For me that was the Shark bc I also know it would save me a load of time in doing my hair. However I highly recommend accepting as many push presents from your loved ones. 😋
new hair and skincare rituals to support the changes in my pp body
If change is inevitable I’m going all in, and I’m going to have a good time doing it. I anticipated hair falling out and looser, drier skin and although it wasn’t all as bad as I imagined, by researching the best products to upgrade my rituals to I added a little bit more joy into my self care.
leaving the house alone for the 1st time
Even if it was to do school pick up for maybe 20 minutes, it was a baby step and the more I did it the more comfortable I started to feel with it.
PHASE 3: choose SUPPORT over pressure
introducing the 1st bottle
Once we started giving the bottle, my pp experience truly shifted. I was allowing in help and in return I was getting to relieve some of pressure I was holding on myself. I knew exclusively nursing wasn’t in my long term plan but I also didn’t realize how much I was going to love it. But now pumping and being able to measure how much baby is eating exactly helps any anxiety that baby might not be eating enough.
baby wearing more often
Thank you @KeaBabies for the perfect wrap to stroll baby boy around the neighborhood and at home. Definitely something I didn’t do much with my first but helped me get hands free on the days it was just me and baby.
spending time with loved ones
Surely having a baby right before the holidays sounds like fun, but I didn’t realize how overwhelming it would feel to have to be ready to go into busy environments by a certain time frame. As much pressure as it was there was also the part of me that loved having him so tiny this year knowing how much he’d grow by the next holiday.
small, pressure-free acts of productivity
Watching dishes pile up in the sink drive me crazy, and boy was it happening quick. So even if I couldn’t get to the full task, completing micro tasks was the way to keep my nervous system happy. Simple declutters, counter wipes, a few dishes at a time, all small, all pressure free.
PHASE 4: RE-ENTER life
1st outing with the baby
Confession: my biggest struggle with having a baby before the peak of flu season terrified me. But I knew I had to face my fear eventually and if I was going to take baby into public it’d be a place that was near and dear to my heart… so Target it was. 😌
1st baby-free lunch with a friend
In the last 2 years of living by myself (and pt with Juliana) I really learned to be content being alone and being at home. I think partially the reason the nb phase wasn’t so hard on me this time around.
But boy I didn’t realize how much I missed a yummy meal and good drinks out with a friend, putting my mommy responsibilities on hold for just a bit. It helped me see those glimmers of normalcy again.
1st planned + intentional cocktail
Breastfeeding is not easy, I’m sure that goes without saying. But trying to enjoy a cocktail without worrying about when and how much baby will eat next is probably why bf moms stay sober or wait till they build a decent stash.
But it is 100% doable within limits and if it’s something you want to treat yourself with, I say go for it!
PHASE 5: rebuild TRUST with my body
OB clearance + 1st gym sesh
All I needed was permission and I was ready to go. I knew how much feeling strong meant to me but I also knew it needed to ease my way back up. With a little help from AI I shared some of my favorite exercises and forms of movement and it helped me build a plan for progressing.
dentist + self care appointments
The gum inflammation during my pregnancy was wiiild and it made me a bit self conscious of my smile so I was super excited for my pp cleaning. Along with a hair and dermatology appointment scheduled I was truly starting to feel myself again.
patience with the process
Patience is always easier said than done. But the older I get the more I learn the process is the best part of the journey.
They say each child in a family gets a different version of their mom/dad and I think with a 10 year age gap this couldn’t help but be more true. Sadly I don’t remember much of the process of raising a 10 year old as I wasn’t as big on documenting and more concerned with enjoying the journey then, all I knew was that I ended up with the most loving intelligent funny brave creative daughter I could ever dream of. So much so it truly inspired me to give raising another a go. This time I’m going to embracing the journey but hope to share more about the rollercoaster and realities of motherhood